they need to just BURY HIM!
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
Omg. The strippers are having a batman vs spiderman showdown. Both on stage. Genius.
she was seriously choking and the whole time all he kept saying was "that's what she said"
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Just remembered to take my BC at the liquor store. Just swallowed it with a free sample of Whiskey.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
STONER SAFETY TIP: don't use the driver's side vanity mirror to check how red your eyes are while you're driving. it won't work. trust me.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
My mom just offered to be my designated driver tonight. I love being an adult.
I grabbed the pretzel bag with my toes last night. I think that day of yoga had paid off.
There is a pool of ranch salad dressing in my purse...I know thats always been something you've wanted to try..so don't even act like you didn't do this.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
dude. I can hear the air.
Randomize
