Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
My drug dealer is spending the weekend in my studio apartment. I feel like I've crossed a line that should never be crossed.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
He told his ice cream cone it 'looked cute' and then started to cry. The Dairy Queen people were not pleased.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
I kinda feel like I was hit by a Prius. Just glad it's not bus status.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
I just gave myself a sponge bath with your sock. I hope you don't mind.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Dougie got over his pride nerves. Found him dancing on a float wearing nothing but rainbow boxers.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
Alex thinks he can revoke my dick privileges haha.
Isn't he the one getting all the privileges ?
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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