so we'll all just be running around naked, basically. and high.
I hope you had to get up out of bed and walk across your room to check this text message
We have to go find her fucking car. She came home from a 80 dollar cab ride, no shoes, and all she remembers is its at a burger king on a street with an H in it
i feel like god sat there all night pointing and laughing at me
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
vodka bottle broke. scooping it out of the plastic tub with a shot glass into a sprite bottle using a ziplock bag as a funnel and straining the glass out with paper towels. good thursday night?
please visit steve this weekend, he is getting mature and responsible and shit which scares me.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
haha all our friends are at the carnival and I'm on stage dry humping a 40 year old
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
My cardio is walking around the office looking for free food.
I'm taking the day off so I can get drunk at Whole Foods before noon
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Randomize
