I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
so...he totally just used scissors to cut up the weed. a wet paper towel to moisten the blunt....and a blow dryer so it wouldn't be wet. this dude either has the worst case of OCD or has the potential to be the next martha stewart.
Just woke up with my keys in one hand and cheesecake in the other.
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
its been so long even thinking about having a dick inside me makes me sore
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
I just had a 30-minute convo with an irrelevant fuckboy from college who decided to tell me FOUR years later he’s sorry for sleeping with 3 girls at once including me.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
The covid immunization shot lady also sold me a mondo bag of really good pot.
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