Britney fell asleep on the couch in the foier, got up stripped then pissed on the floor. Then got dressed and went to sleep in it. Also downstairs toilet clogged. Not me. I will be gone by the time you get home from work. Have fun.
I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
I am no longer a man. I just realized I prefer Spongebob to college football.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
you should have seen it. it was just a bunch of guys in togas chanting the username and password to a brazzers account we all share. best thing that has happened to our group
Yeah then she waddled like a duck in silence sat down and ate the entire paper towel roll.
I WILL NOURISH YOU WITH SOUP AND PENIS!!!!!! And a sandwich of your choosing.......you like turkey?
I remember saying to him "Fun fact! If you lie this way it's easier to deep throat!" I even judge me.
don't do it for the experience, do it for the story. now get your ass in that bedroom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
I walked into Anna's room this morning and she was like teary eyed, with pizza sauce all over the place
Yeah he told me he wanted a serious relationship, but he's posting pictures of his dick on Kik.
Fuck him and his perfect arms, huge penis and relentless ability to ignore me.
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