just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Flaming shots last night. Missing an eye brow. There a connection?
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
I pretty much told him I was too sober for this an just walked away and all I heard was "IT'S BECAUSE IM A BAD KISSER ISN'T IT" OVER AND OVER AGAIN
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
if you're not jumping for joy when you see penis then you're looking at the wrong ones.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
My diet fell off the wagon when I began texting the pizza delivery guy my location on frat row.
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
so you can go out and drink with me then fuck me, or you can come over when i get home and fuck me, or you can come over before and fuck me, or you can come over before and after and fuck me... so many fucking options
Randomize
