After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Everyone was in the walk-in getting high, and I had to be all cool. Serving soup and salads. Night manager status doesn't pay enough.
Sending emails to my new boss whilst unable to move from the toilet seat because of alcohol. Great start to a new job as a school counselor.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
Considering we almost incited a riot on behalf of LGBT rights I have to say that was the best time for our moral compass to turn south.
He has no idea he’s my boyfriend.
All I'm saying is there better be a bow on your dick for my birthday
You’d probably be happy to know that I think I’ve mastered the skill of knowing “my type” and then steering clear
FINALLY. I THOUGHT THIS DAY WOULD NEVER COME!
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Im not as flexible as I once was, but I still managed to get eaten out in the front seat of a hummer behind keddies.
Randomize
