dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
so the situation is a+b=c where "a" is how much you weight, "b" is my gravitational pull, and "c" is how erect your penis is.
What are you drinking?
Shitty Coors light. OM NOM NOM TASTES LIKE HIGH SCHOOL
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
i an so hammered right now. I'm about to pass out but i just found the lion king dvd and i'm so happy words don't even describe.
I'm gonna name my first kid mufasa regardless if It's a boy or girl
I'm so never shaving my vag in a target bathroom for him again.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
That's what I'm here for. To bitch slap you into believing in yourself.
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
I saw pigeons eating ur dried up puke today. Last night was fucking great
Adding to the list of things I have said out loud at the bar that I shouldn't have: "I am the yoda of sucking dick"
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
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