Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
adderall just fell out of my nose in class. guy next to me just nodded.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
I keep hearing lesbian porn and I'm the only one home. I don't think this is healthy
May or may not have just lost a contact hanging out Anthony's sunroof. Drunk. Hint: I can only see out of one eye right now.
Not sure how a movie about Jesus has managed to make me feel insecure about my boobs but it has.
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Nothing bonds a father and daughter like washing her puke off the front steps
I'm not entirely sure how getting 'house drunk' turned into us getting trashed, being serenaded by karaoke and going out. But it needs to happen again.
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
Hi, I put a dog in your house, I hope it's yours.
She puked on the floor because she said she really liked to clean.
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