NO FUCKING WAY. PLEASE MAKE HER IMPLANT THAT POOR KID INTO A RESPONSIBLE UTERUS.
I'm so over stopping myself from talking about my sexual experiences in front of children.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
29 Of The Most Hilarious And Embarrassing Walks Of Shame Ever
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
Made it home ok. Only got hit by one car.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Are we still banned from the library?
Every single person in dollar tree stares at you if you are buying a pregnancy test and wearing a charlie brown costume. Just FYI.
These 23 Dudes Get Giddy From Dem Titties
Yea. Some girl set a laundry machine on fire. She's not getting married.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
IM TRYING TO SAY GOODNIGHT STOP FOR LIKE FIVE SECONDS WITH THE DICK SUCKING
I mostly blame me being such a miserable fuck on the fact that I was born on a Monday.