so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
he literally just asked me which v neck he should wear tomorrow.
stranger just walked up to the fridge at the party, took the hawaiin punch out, drank it straight from the bottle, looked at everyone who stared in awe and said "im fucking thirsty" and put it back.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
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i wont go near him until the smell goes away , and he takes the chex mix box off his head.
Then you can skip the embarrassing can I date your ex since you're a lesbian now conversation
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Dont tell her I prefer to have an aura of mystique surronding me and my penis.
What part of I'm done do you not understand? Im not going to send you sex photos to prove I've moved on..
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I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
she said she walked into the kitchen and i was sitting ass naked on the floor chugging her parents vodka.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Only time and a comprehensive case study of all of your relationships will tell.
I'm naked in a forest ranger station right now
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.