I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
We did it and he fell asleep and I was bored so I decided to go back to the party...is that bad?
it got awkward when she realized that our nickname for her was "The Hambeast"
One of my preschool students told me today that it's not pollution that makes the water in lakes unclean. It's the hobos. I was absolutely speechless. And just so proud.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
No longer is one of my lifelong dreams to ride in a kangaroo pouch. You have eternally ruined that for me. Thank you.
But college guys get to crossfade so there's that
No idea what that is
Like getting bent? When you drink and smoke together...
I'm 30 stop using your cool kids words
You are the jesus of drinking
Well now you know not to take drugs from your friends. Take it from stangers. They're more reliable.
when she didn't finish her burrito you wanted to call the cops because you said it was neglect
Randomize
