Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
my hangover today makes thursday's feel like a bubble bath.
We met on a dual walk of shame. It has to be love, we can't let that go to waste. I want to tell our children that story.
the vast amounts of cleavage i'm sporting to my final says "no, I didn't study but don't worry I've got something lined up for when I don't graduate".
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
If this wasn't a work function my tits would be out already.
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Pretending to leave a voicemail when the person answers the phone....that's gotta be drunk dial level 99
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
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