I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
Either you made a spaghetti vodka smoothie last night, or you puked in the blender.
So I cleaned out my gym bag. Found half a bottle of malibu.
You know, I could pretend I'm shocked but what's the use?
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
I'm going to join a nudist colony to win $1000. There are no down-sides to this.
They poured beer (3 cans) down the toilet so bubbles can be drunk in fishy heaven
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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