If there is ever a next time, care about me enough to lube it up no matter what my drunk ass says
You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
I walk of shamed back from his dorm in costume while his dad and brother were waiting outside to drive him home. his dad apologized to me. my life never gets old.
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm duct taped to my bed with a condom in my hand. something went wrong
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
I think the guy in front of me just puked in a styrofoam cup.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know what happened this summer, I've lost my sense of morality. All I do now is work, get drunk, and have sex near national landmarks.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Took my plan b at Costco today, sample Sunday for the win.
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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