what the fuck were we smoking when we had a conversation about how my brother would be so proud if i fucked an orange alien?!?
So I think we're almost at the age where we should start calling boys men. Now what age do they start living up to the new title?
Most never. Some around 65.
then she woke up from sleeping for an hour and the first thing she said was "i regret it already"
Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Let's make jello shots for tomorrow
What's going on tomorrow?
Nothing, it's Wednesday
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Do you recall us playing flip cup on your head?
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
I'll never be able to have sex on these sheets. I'd have to cover up the eyes of every single Elmo.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
I'm filtering his penis picture so I can see it better
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
I was peer pressured into smoking weed by a bunch of LGBTQ teenagers
Randomize
