yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
one of the RAs is here. he told me his name is optimus prime and then took his shirt off and fell down
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
I drew a nude short fat middle aged woman today and liked it
It was honestly one of my favorite days in art class except for the 20 min she faced me and kept looking at me and we made eye contact
I sat on my couch last night watching What Women Want, eating ice cream, and sobbing "why doesn't she like me?" Why was I born a man?
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
My roommate fed me my birth control pill while I was hungover laying on the couch so that's how my morning has been
its not everyday you see batman on the ground with someone riverdancing on his face bourbon street never disappoints
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
I look forward to getting really drunk tonight and startling some rando’s mother tomorrow morning while she’s up early making a turkey
It’s a holiday tradition at this point
Randomize
