If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
I don't even want to talk about it, I'm traumatized. Even the dog knew to take advantage of the most intoxicated girl at the party...
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
He crawled over to me grabbed my boob asked me if I liked cats and then passed out. If that's really my RA, it's gonna be a long year
did i send you the picture of me smiling with the magnum wrapper?
why can't I meet attractive men at the places I like to hang out? like books a million. or the liquor store.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
I never forget a pussy, even blackout me gives me that memory.
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
I just my had my first cup of coffee in a week. I think I might orgasm.
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
Randomize