i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
He googled "how long will i be drunk" and just started crying
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
before we even ate breakfast we'd found an eighth of weed in some old purse she never uses. it was gone by lunch
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
also had sex in his sister's princess style bunk bed.
but you are a princess that one was appropriate.
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
We were cuddling in his bed and I asked him a question and followed by making a microphone with my hand and told him to speak into it. If he never talks to me again that's probably why.
Does she know she is talking to people who slam shots of fireball and chase it with vodka?
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
