12 pack with dinner. Living by yourself is awesome.
well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
history professor just told us he has magic fingers. i'm going for it.
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
Found my bike today. On top of the garage. I'm not even going to ask myself why.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you ever just feel like you can feel hormones radiating from your uterus?
whatever bro. i had ice cream and whiskey for breakfast and its noon. this is the second worst christmas ever.
In the morning when you read your texts, just fyi you showed up at my house drunk off your ass and shoe less and demanded I go to the bar. You need Jesus.
I have an ideal penis or slightly above ideal penis in every country that isn't ruined by the specter of communism
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
he was really really nice, and I did coke off of his dong that night too
Randomize