They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
woke up with a used condom shoved in my ear. i officially hate alcohol.
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
It's 3 am and I'm buying cat food and batteries for my vibrator. Good thing I shaved my legs for this.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
The problem I'm having with looking for jobs while drunk is reading is really hard
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
He fucked my brains out then fed me cheese and peanut butter. I might be in love.
You told me not to tell you found out you're pregnant..
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
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