I heard it from a little bird bananas is gonna be there
Is this bird reliable bc I don't wanna be wasted running around the bar asking where bananas is
just walked into the room and her sister said loudly, "do him, or I will."
on a brighter note, the strip club found my atm card
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
For the amount of money I just spent on my dogs toe, I could have fucked the entire B squad at a low end strip club.
Im cutting you off tonight ONE boy at a time
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
I love THIS fish, the rest of the ocean can go fuck itself. I am ahab and he is my whale
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i remember going to sleep after the 4th time i threw up this morning and hoping i didn't have to again because then it would be uneven between saturday and sunday. my ocd is getting out of control
I have seriously seen way too may DIY cut off jean booty shorts and half shirts on fat girls this summer. Fuck you Pinterest.
How many nights in 2015 can we have no one get injured, run away crying, or get into a brawl?
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
I mean, I was expecting a little more coke snorting and a little less kids and cake
saying im screwed is like saying the titanic took on a little water.
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