god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
and then he said he has been waiting since high school to touch my boobs
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
I just discovered cum stains from two different guys on my wall. I don't know whether to be proud or horrified.
I blacked out, started puking and peed on the guy I was hooking up with. Mid hand job.
How old are you? 14? Who gives hand jobs anymore?
Salt in an open wound right now.
If man night ends at some point, hit me up and let me prove my vagina still exists.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
Why is there a whip in the kitchen?
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
Can you get an STD by sharing underwear? Walk of shamed home and realized I was wearing someone else’s panties
No one knows. This doesn’t happen to normal people.
Randomize
