so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
then we talked for a little and he asked my last name which since I have yet to get a fb request I'm 95% sure its for a restraining order
Thanks for not cleaning the drain like you were supposed to. I just vomited in the shower and I had to stand in it until I was done conditioning.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
Remind me again why a vodka watermelon can't be a thanksgiving dish
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I just had to call my mom to come pick me up stoned at a Lana's house and beg her to buy me Taco Bell. I'm graduating from college in 14 hours. Fuck
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
I kept telling you not to give them blowjobs, but you kept screaming back, "it's okay, we're friends on facebook!"
Truth. Though I have held steadfast to the notion while the rest of you wavered. I had faith in his homosexuality.
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
There’s a child, alone, sitting on a picnic table out there, making bird noises
Randomize
