is it bad that I sent her a picture of my penis on her husbands birthday?
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
i fucked her mom dude
there's something to tell the kids
THEY HAVE A VOMIT TROUGH.
What?
A TROUGH FOR VOMIT.
Would it help you get over me if I told you that I had unprotected sex last night?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
Ahh good point. I got some interesting mental pics and I'm slowly entering a "fuck it, lets do weird shit" phase sexually, but you may have already figured that out since I've been fucking you sideways and upside down a lot lately.
I'm beginning to think that women just have dogs at home as an excuse to leave ASAP after hooking up, without sounding like a typical guy.
You tried to steal my pants at 3am saying they were yours and somebody was gonna die, not cool dude
Sorry I yelled at you and called you Amish and puked on your eggs
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
Randomize
