You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
So baked. Thought the twigs on the sidewalk were caterpillars with the ability to harden in self defense. Had to pick one up to be sure.
When I told my boss I'm using a vacation day for 4/20, he gave me his personal cell phone number and winked at me.
Despite what happened tonight, Im still expecting Jesus birthday sex
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I really like your cover photo on fb that looks cool
In case birth mom friends me back, thought I should make it less drunk looking.
But he was still all, "YOU TEXTED TONY WHILE YOU WERE GETTING FUCKED?!" Like THAT was the weird part.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Listen, she cheated on him first. I've known both of them since we were 12. They have no secrets from me. And yes, as a matter of fact, I absolutely did enjoy screaming out his name into his, soon to be, ex wife's pillow.
Randomize
