I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
Why do you apologize after every time we have sex?
Just saw the new iPhone. I would totally let Steve Jobs and Jon Ive eiffel tower me right now.
So... i mean if they do have cameras in his apartment buildings pool room atleast we gave them a little show.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Now he's crying and asking for 'the cameras' to come out. The one cop is laughing
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
let’s be honest I’d fucking Irish step dance on your grave, asshole
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
Yes. I am out of condoms. I kept filling them with glow paint and playing with them when I was on mushrooms, which resulted in me having unprotected sex last weekend
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Well, you started screaming "I dont know you GO AWAY" to your mom when she was holding your hair as you threw up in her garden.
my Mom is now my Eskimo sister... she fucked my ex in my bed and took a selfie
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
