see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
i called her out for picking her nose in public and he still wonders why i don't like her!
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
She tags her boyfriend in all of her pictures on her heart...
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
Gonna send a picture of my negative pregnancy test with the message "Merry Christmas" to the guys I've been sleeping with. That alone, will put a huge dent in my shopping list of gifts for people.
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
Random pof guy just messaged me initiating a Pokemon battle. Want to be a bridesmaid?
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
Randomize
