I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
Every day I regret the life decisions that led me to bank management and NOT being a coke addicted stripper. Every. Single. Day.
I wish Samuel L. Jackson would narrate our bar crawls
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
googling pictures of Lindsey Lohan so that I know what to wear to court is definitely a low point in my life
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
he looks SO much like Drake, I feel like an extreme groupie every time we have sex.
2 men making out for 2 seconds to trick a cop so they don't get arrested for being pulled over rolling a blunt is not gay.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Going to put that on my resume. "Only accidentally snapchatted my titties to all of my friends once."
Thank fucking Christ I was not wearing pants or eating chocolate cake last night.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...
Currently looking up Winnie-the-Pooh porn.
I'm going to need to invest in some knee pads if I keep having nights like tonight
Randomize
