I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Listen, i'm watching playoff hockey and eating waffles. i just don't have time for your drama today.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
you made sure to tell everyone that the amount of people you had slept with was actually quite low, especially when the size of your breasts was taken into account
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
So... Sex in my rain boots last night. Trashy or a great show of character?
If it was with a guy, trashy. Sex with a girl is never trashy.
Randomize
