You and your empty threats of no sex. Like.u.cud.hold.out.
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
my financial goal is to have my cable back before football season starts
yeah, it's no longer just 'day drinking' when it's 5pm and you're knocking over fruit displays at fresh market
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
I think cutting a patient out of a owl costume is a first for those guys. It's a good story at least.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
Sorry, I thought I responded to your question. My name is Jon, we kinda had a sleepover at your friends place in OC. Don't know if you remember me, you were "dick chugging" like there was no tomorrow last night.
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
Just because my bed is easier to get to doesn't mean it's okay to fuck in.
then he said the sex was mediocre and that it was because of me. and that we could try again tomorrow.
it was 100% mediocre because of him, and we will 100% not be trying again tomorrow.
Randomize
