im pretty sure i tried to attack the vending machine last night
lol who won
well im in the hospital right now so u tell me
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
Just saw a girl i'm pretty sure is simultaneously jailbait and a milf. I never want to leave mexico.
We found your brother, passed out, floating in our pool, with a bottle, on a blow up mattress. How did he mange to walk 2 blocks and get into our backyard?
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
The last thing I want is a chocolate mold of my cock competing with my real cock for time spent in your mouth
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
Somewhere on my work laptop I have a map visualizing all the area codes that Ludacris has ho's
I hope that wasn't done on billed time
I can guarantee that it was
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
I picked up a towel, and butt beads fell out of it.
Oh yeah... Surprise!
She looked up and said "I like this." I asked "what do you like?" she said "penis."
Randomize
