hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
listen. just hotwire a car, take off the license plate, make up a new one on a sheet of paper and go the speed limit. i do it like, at least 3x a week.
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Make this decision based on your love for dick - NOT based on the fact that its probably one of the worst things you've ever thought of doing
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
If I am telling you about the details of the shits I take I probably don't want to have sex with you. Probably.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know that text I sent you last night at 2? That was 5 minutes before I ran face first into a wall of not okay
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