Bleh. If he hadn't ascended into heaven and sat at the right hand of the father, Jesus would be rolling over in his grave right now.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
I'm not sure what happened last night, but my turtle seems afraid of me.
U shoulda just taken her to a stall and banged her and let me watch the game. Some friend u r.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
They all laughed at me when I bought that necklace from Life Alert. Who's laughing now?
You flooded my bathroom while trying to construct a hot tub. All three of you were completely naked.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
Your cock deserves a montage
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
In Texas. Drank way too much wine. Puked in a gallon zip lock bag. Passed out at 445 with the ENTIRE family here. Got up at 745 in time for dinner. I made you proud!!!
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
I jerked off 12 hours ago exactly. I owe it to my penis to get laid.
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