Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
For a second, I wondered if I could smoke pizza.
triple team girl just facebook chatted me. do i tell her i had a nice time?
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Smoking a bowl and ordering Dominos, you want in on either, both, or none?
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
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