A big part of growing up is learning how to tastefully stare at women
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
he just kept saying that he had liquor dick..then he tried to fuck me without removing his pants.
One of the cleaning ladies on my floor just screamed from the bathroom
you went up to him and asked if you could have "friend sex." He looked like a 7 year old on christmas morning
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
How's work?
Spinning.
that wasn't rum that I poured down your throat while you were sleeping
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
my friend was passed out in the bathroom so I threw up in the coffee maker, not the pot the water reservoir that kind of drunk.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
So why are your hands bright blue and have you seen my roommate.
Both questions will answer each other.
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
There's a rash on my genitals that would like a word with you.
Randomize
