I just saw a hot homeless man
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
i mean he wasn't bad looking, but i wouldn't have slept with my professor if i knew everyone would get an A
I put labels all over the house on things I think are mine. A cactus, the dog, and a bottle of wine.
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
Its fiiine, tuesday is like the thursday of wine wednesday. And i mean, free beer for girls at the grove...im not NOT gonna take that offer up!
Look at your life. Look at your choices.
It was disgusting, and I would've rather licked the condensation off the windows instead, but I figured that's wasn't very ladylike
We just taught the Brazilian how to smoke out of a vuvuzela.
So when this rash is gone wanna hang out?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
The more time I spend surrounded by Mormons, the more I miss alcohol.
Randomize
