It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
you guys were way drunker than both of me
I'm good, just tired from chardonnay and giving hand jobs.
So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I was running around taking people's drinks at the bar and just dumping it into my Gatorade bottle screaming roofies.
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
DONT LET HIM GET NAKED. JUST SAY NO
No. If I hated you would get none. Then I would eat them all in front of you and laugh at your tears. Although that hasn't been ruled out for entertainment purposes. Nothing purposeful.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
Do you know how to get blood out of tile grout?
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
I just found a contact in my phone named "Sam 'it Won't Fit' Wilson". No clue when or where it came from....
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
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