these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
In retrospect, it was a terrible idea, going down on her with these ulcers in my mouth.
I researched the whole pregnancy breast feeding with piercings. I think you dont have to worry about the trifecta milk spraying thing.
His idea of romance is drunkenly leaving me dead dandelions on my car in the middle of the night
We will have to go big on the 4th! Nothing says independence like the impending doom of an ankle monitor
I'm sorry. But when a stripper driving a Bentley tells me I have potential..... I gotta at least listen to her proposal. God did not mean for me to waste these tits on law school.
i know i said i'd always be there for you, but i'm beginning to think that what you call "being there for me" the american judicial system calls reckless endangerment.
Mike showed up naked and in handcuffs. Again. Feel free to come over and laugh because I'm not helping this time.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
A girl just managed to steal a whole gallon of ice cream. I'm letting her go because that is impressive.
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
