so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
Well, a cop just pulled up. This could go either way.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
Lives are in shambles. Livers are in disrepair. Our friend was missing for 2 days. His brother slept in a porta potty. God damn you college world series
after i talked him through a bulleted list of why we couldn't have sex he just said "but it would be fun...."
This was just another one of those days you wished you had a penis-size indicator instead of wasting your time isn't it?
Just don't eat pie out of the sink. It's a real blow to the self esteem.
Either way, we will celebrate half Christmas the only way we can. Completely and irresponsibly wasted.
Pretty sure the nurse said at one point I was in full restraints because I tried surfing my stretcher
I want to just live in between your butt cheeks.
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
In hindsight, drunkenly yelling "I'M TICKLISH" might not have been an entirely wise decision
I Woke up still tied to the bed. I would say, it was a good night!
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
