I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
Well, there are worse ways to make $50 at a gay club.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
The bottle of Wild Turkey is empty and there is a pile of wet cement in the garage. What happened?
He just yells "mush!" as they're having sex.
Dude, tumbleweeds have been rolling through my bed lately. This is my dryest dry spell since I was married.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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