I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
WHY AM I BEING COCKBLOCKED BY A KID PLAYING HAVA NAGILA ON THE SAXAPHONE
So puking trix and chicken wings is horrible but atleast we got free drinks for taking the trash out at the bar we are really movin up in the world
I am not even close to finishing violently masturbating over that video.
I really wanted to suck your dick, but I also didn't want to miss any of the movie
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
Dude, you need to come and get her. She's sitting on the bathroom floor making hearts with her menstrual blood. And remind me never to let her do jello shots again
Saw a sign that said the chorus of never gonna give you up was enough time to wash your hands. Coronavirus has Rick rolled me.
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