just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
i luv seein jocks study. its like watching monkeys masturbate.
Just found a hundred dollar bill on the ground. Hope you're looking to drink tonight
he has officially spend more money on me than any other boy. and its all gone to plan b. awesome.
Even when you're not here I still manage to get pad thai in my vagina
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I think a van full of parolees just blew me kisses. Thoughts?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
you know it's a good party when the fucking floor caves in. THE FUCKING FLOOR.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
I just realized I slept with a guy who used the pickup line "do you have a bandaid? I skinned my knee when I fell for you."
Now that it's over, I can finally say it and not feel bad,dude. Her mustache is better than yours.
Everclear isn't food dammit
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
Randomize
