Text. Mid BJ. 8 points.
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
Just met a female bro. Things are weird at the rugby party.
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
I HAVE to find her. I've got a pretty decent pic of her footprint on my headboard. Wonder if I can get one of the podiatry majors to help?
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
What was the name of that sleazy asshole I'm not allowed to sleep with?
Randomize
