; Think of how many worthless people would b non existant if there was no liquor so their parents never hooked up
very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
I totally just used John Mayer's lyrics to get laid.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Dude she pregamed for her sorority's philanthropy.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
At least he finally released me from his spooning oven of death...
Son of a bitch took my liquid eyeliner
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
So, I just found out Ireland, is #1 in binge drinking. I know its Sunday but this one is for America.
Randomize
