So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
He just made a mudslide using rubinoff and swiss miss packets. This can't end well....
On the bright side, I hit her with the door on the way in
Pretty sure I tied my shoes laces together to keep myself from driving drunk. Fell like six times. Keep forgetting
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
I'm lying here drinking water from a shot glass..moving is not an option right now
Would it be considered cannibalistic if I wanted to eat off his bacon tattoo?
Also, I guess I made friends with the guy who caught me peeing behind a bush.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
Randomize