At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
I'm just saying, margarita tuesday would turn anyone gay.
He threw up, and left his credit card next to the puddle. He kept on saying he wanted to pay for the damages.
She's got a butler. A fucking butler. Shes like batman, but with a better ass.
Just saw a guy I fucked in a clown suit in the bar. It's not Halloween. I have got to start making better life decisions.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
He looked like he was trying to woo a lady version of himself by playing goblin music on his guitar.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Not now. Out of camp chairs. Carving a new one with a chainsaw. Mushrooms are starting to kick and I gotta get this done NOW.
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
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