After 9 shots a girl with a mustache......still not attractive
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
Chinese roommate asked me this a.m when u left if all girls here have multiple boyfriends..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
I just drank til 6am then boned a 32 yr old that looks exactly like ET. Oh god.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
What I love about college? The kid tripping balls has a kayak made readily available to him on any given Wednesday, Saturday, or Sunday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
I'm allowing myself one mistake a year. He gets to be 2012.
so i woke up at six am and his bathroom was flooded. i think i fucked shit up in my sleep.
I spilled wine on my pillowcase and I figure it's basically my lifeblood so I'm just leaving it
I told the border patrol officer she was smuggling drugs in her ass. I doubt she cheats on me again.
You were arrested in a tiara again... maybe you shouldn’t wear one.
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