I'm at the doctor and the male nurse (haha) asked me if I smoked, drank or did drugs, and when he said 'drugs' he looked me right in the eye and did a perfect wrist rocket.
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
You threw a hot dog at his face...I wouldn't call you either.
Bible prof is the guy I made out with at the gay bar on the fourth. He doesn't remember.
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Why doesn't the washer have a puke setting?
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
This little shit keeps eating the playdoh so i replaced the green with wasabi from work. Wonder what his parents are gonna think when he burns his soft palette?
I send out my deepest condolences for seeing my ass last night.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
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Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
Um, It's tempting but I'm not into coke or farmers.
Now we just need to figure out why your underwear was in your bra
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