I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
You may or may not of thrown up on your shoes, and you tried to give me a wet willy in my eye.
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
Never backflip into an above ground pool. I think the gash will be smaller by Monday though.
We found you wrapped up in a tarp in the garage the next morning, thats how real shit got.
I believe you would have been proud of me last night.. I was chasin Fireball shots with Jack and Coke. Guess there's a reason they call me Whiskey Woman.
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
1) Woke up alone with my bathing suit on inside out spooning an empty bottle of Jack, 2) get the fuck on to my level 3) please pick me up and bring a stuffed pony, some Oreo's and my pride...
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize
