Your tits are I can't wait for
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
you'd think with how big her nose is she'd have a better smelling pussy..
The mystery has been solved. Seagulls have sex doggy-style.
We turned everything surrounding BP and the oil leak into a "that's what she said" drinking game. We've been drunk for a month
My niece just unknowingly cock blocked me. Obviously, someone won't be getting a christmas present this year.
We just had to use a designated driver to get to night class.
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
If last night was a preview of 2015, I quit.
Spoiler alert: my plans for Halloween are going to make our dealer's birthday look like a bunch of mormon ladies having a scrapbooking circle
Please tell me why we have been neighbors since elementary school and waited until the night before I moved to fuck.
Randomize
