Should I ask him to prom mid fuck? That way he has to say yes.
If you are in NYC and not seeing anyone, you should come fucke me now because:1 i am not in love with you anymore, 2 i am drunk enough where i won't feel the n eed to kisx you awardly to avoid your beard, 3we have unfinished business that i wpn't get -assed unyil orgass have been had, 4 i really really want to
My mom is giving me a "don't tape yourself during sex" talk. It's going to be a long car ride.
she asked me if i wanted her to take her wedding ring off while she was giving me a handjob.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
she demanded that I make her breakfast too so im in the bathroom cooking bacon with her straightener
I haven't found him passed out in the living room covered in noodles for a while now so I guess he's getting better with the drinking.
2048oz a keg...divide that by solo cup... comes out to 128 beers...simplifies into 5.3repeating cases...drinkable between two people
and u failed math?
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I took a dab in Denver and was I. Rocky Mountain national park almost to Wyoming before I realized I missed my turn.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
Randomize
